We started packing. At first only stuff from within closets (games, winterwear and such), so it was not really felt on the outside. The kids cannot really fully understand what they are about to be facing, but they do feel something big is about to happen. The morning goodbyes at the kindergartens end up with the kids crying, which is something we forgot about long ago. The elder one is coming back from school and starts searching what’s missing around the house. The first significant visible difference was when the books disappeared from the shelfs. Suddenly it gets empty…
And as the house gets empty, the mind fills up. With the house renting issue that is not yet resolved, with what to pack first, with goodbyes, with farewell presents, with plans for the next month before leaving, with boxes and bags and endless bureaucratic tasks. And some strange feeling starts to take over as I find myself looking at the things that happen around us, of which we are not part anymore. School year kickoff meetings I do not attend, publications for events that will take place after we’re gone and all kind of ‘last times’ that prove that this is for real.
And the excitement…
And all those combinations that make up the notion of “excitement” that spin your head around and turn your stomach up-side-down – a sense of freedom accompanied by worries, a moment of smile followed by a moment of tear, the confidence in our decisions together with the fear of the unknown, the joy of leaving the race of routine behind with the realization of how much we are going to long for that same routine. The fact that these are happy days, and also somewhat sad.